Confusional Arousals And Sleep Drunkenness

confusional arousals cartoon

If you’ve ever had an episode of confusional arousals, you may have experienced something as strange as what I’m about to describe.

After going to bed as normal one day, I later woke up in the middle of the night and sat up in bed. I’m not sure how long I was sitting there without doing anything at first, but I do remember feeling a bit thirsty.

Instead of doing the logical thing and reaching for the glass of water on my bedside table, however, I picked up my phone.

It was only when lifted it to my mouth that I must have realized it didn’t contain any liquid, and put it back on the table.

I then vaguely remember rummaging around for the real glass of water and knocking it off the table onto the stone floor.

I think the sound of the shattering glass must have snapped me out of the confused state. But even then I couldn’t quite understand what I was trying to do.

Over the next few minutes, I slowly came back to reality, and eventually got up to clean the floor. It was only when I was back in bed that it dawned on me that I hadn’t been my usual self.

It seems I’d experienced an episode of what’s known as confusional arousals. I’m sure it wasn’t the first time either, but like many people, I probably don’t usually remember the episodes.

Do you wake up confused and do unusual things?

If you sometimes behave in a confused, strange, or even aggressive way if you wake up in the night, it could be that you’ve also experienced confusional arousals.

And if it tends to happen in the morning, it could potentially be that you have ‘sleep drunkenness’. This is the popular name for what sleep experts call severe sleep inertia. Or in layman’s terms, being unusually slow to come back to life when you wake up in the morning!

In this article, I’ll be taking a look at what confusional arousals are, what’s thought to cause them, and what can be done about them.

I’ll also discuss some fascinating research that shows how common a sleep disorder it is, and who is more likely to have it.

Poll results

Way back in 2015, I ran a poll to find out how often readers experience confusional arousals.

Note that it’s a poll of people reading this article because it’s relevant to them. So the figure of 2.8% who have never had them is likely to be higher in the general population.

Interestingly though, out of 657 readers, 230 said they have confusional arousals very regularly (1-3 times per week). However, 188 people only have a few per year.

chart showing the results of a poll into the frequency people experience confusional arousals

What are confusional arousals?

The International Classification of Sleep Disorders diagnostic manual describes confusional arousals as being when someone wakes up in a confused state.

That might sound obvious, but the confusion can take different forms. For example, you might be confused about who you are, where you are, or what’s happening around you.

If someone talks to you, you might have slow or slurred speech. You might give short, blunt answers to questions, or make no sense at all.

According to the American Academy of Sleep Medicine, confusional arousals typically occur as you wake from the slow-wave, or N3, sleep stage.

In the spectrum of sleep disorders, confusional arousals are classified as a parasomnia. Parasomnias include unwanted events or experiences around sleep, such as sleep talking, sleep paralysis, and nightmares.

In an interesting research study published in 2020, the authors describe confusional arousals in a way that I think helps understand what can happen during a typical episode:

CA are episodes during which the subject sits on the bed and looks around as if confused. CA often begin with automatic movements, vocalizations or moaning and can progress to thrashing about in bed or violent behaviors towards oneself or others. Individuals usually appear with slow mentation and have poor reactivity to environmental stimuli; attempts to awaken the person are often unsuccessful and may be met with vigorous resistance.

Who experiences confusional arousals?

It’s believed that an equal number of men and women experience confusional arousals. And it’s more common in children and adults under the age of 35.

In 2014, researchers at the Stanford University School of Medicine published some fascinating research into confusional arousals.

The research made major news headlines, perhaps in part because they could use the captivating title of ‘sleep drunkenness’.

Importantly, the researchers discovered that it’s surprisingly common and that specific groups of people are more likely to have it.

Key points and findings

Here are the main findings of the Stanford study:

  • They interviewed 19,136 adults in the United States.
  • 15.2% had experienced confusional arousals in the last year. Over 50% of those had experienced it more than once a week.

Of the 15.2% who had confusional arousals, they found:

  • 84% were associated with either a sleep disorder, a mental health disorder, or were taking psychotropic drugs.
  • 70.8% had another sleep disorder.
  • 14.8% sleepwalk.
  • 37.4% had a mental disorder (mostly bipolar and panic disorders).
  • 31.3% were using psychotropic medication (mainly antidepressants).
  • Just 0.9% had no related condition or identifiable cause and could be said to have a confusional arousal disorder.
  • 8.6% have either partial or no memory of episodes.

Different types of confusion

The study found the following were the most common types of behavior or confusion:

  • Temporospatial disorientation (confusion about where or when they are): 57%
  • Hallucinations: 36%
  • Difficulty speaking or thinking clearly: 34%
  • Confused behaviors: 20%
  • Sleepwalking:15%
  • No memory of episodes: 9%

Interestingly, the team concluded that confusional arousals were often reported as arising from the treatment of other sleep disorders. And that both sleep and mental disorders were important factors – as seen from the figures above.

Aggressive behavior provoked by another person

Do you or someone you know sometimes act in an aggressive way during an episode? This is understandably worrying and can be stressful for partners. So why does it happen and what can you do about it?

In 2007, Mark R. Pressman, Ph.D. published an interesting review that looked at violent episodes during confusional arousals.

He wrote that violent episodes aren’t common. But when they do happen, it’s usually in two situations:

  • If someone wakes you up.
  • When you behave in a complex way in bed in your sleep, and someone else tries to calm you by holding or grabbing you.

He further clarifies that:

Violent behaviors associated with provocations and/or close proximity were found to be present in 100% of confusional arousal patients

So perhaps it’s best to avoid physical contact with someone having an episode unless they are putting themselves or others in danger. And to try to avoid waking someone up who is prone to confusional arousals.

Causes and risk factors

Confusional arousals are thought to happen when transitioning from deep sleep to a lighter sleep stage, or when woken up suddenly.

Researchers in 2018 summarize what happens in a slightly more technical way:

Confusional arousals (CA) are characterized by the association of behavioral awakening with persistent slow-wave electroencephalographic (EEG) activity during non-rapid eye movement (NREM) sleep—suggesting that sensorimotor areas are “awake” while non-sensorimotor areas are still “asleep.” 

The American Academy of Sleep Medicine lists several possible causes:

  • Recovery from sleep deprivation.
  • Consuming alcohol.
  • Sleep apnea.
  • Periodic limb movement disorder.
  • Psychotropic medication.
  • Drug abuse.
  • Being forced to wake up.

The American Academy of Sleep Medicine also suggests that there are several possible risk factors.

They say you are more likely to experience confusional arousals if you have a relative who has them. In addition, the following factors can increase the chance of them happening:

  • Rotating and night shift work.
  • Other sleep disorders (hypersomnia, insomnia, circadian rhythm sleep disorders).
  • Not enough sleep
  • Stress.
  • Worry.
  • Bipolar and depressive disorders.

Treatment and prevention

There isn’t a specific cure for confusional arousals as such, and no one-size-fits-all treatment.

If another disorder is causing the episodes, that’s what needs to be treated. This is something to speak to your doctor about, especially if you have signs of a serious sleep disorder like sleep apnea.

The same applies to mental health conditions that can be treated and managed. And if you’re taking medication, it’s a good idea to mention the episodes to your doctor.

If you drink alcohol or take recreational drugs, it might help to see if you have fewer episodes when you don’t drink or take drugs.

It’s also important to try to focus on your sleep and make sure you’re getting enough – don’t allow yourself to become sleep deprived over time.

The standard advice from sleep professionals to practice good sleep hygiene might also help. In particular, find ways to reduce stress, and develop a consistent and relaxing bedtime routine so you go to bed in a calm frame of mind.

You’re not alone

One final note if you’ve been worrying about your behavior is to remember that you’re not alone. Don’t be embarrassed or think you’re abnormal because of what you do when you’re not fully aware.

Many people experience sleep disorders or go through periods where bizarre things happen to them at night.

If it’s worrying you or having an impact on your life or relationships, it’s a good idea to speak to a medical professional though. At the very least, they should be able to set your mind at ease.

The funny side

Personally, I choose to deal with it by trying not to take it too seriously. I try to laugh at myself when I do strange things like attempting to leave my bedroom via the wardrobe (yes, really!).

I know I have other sleep problems and am constantly working on those. So I hope that one day I’ll get on top of my sleep problems once and for all. Perhaps the confusional arousals will then resolve too.

Until then, other than worrying about replacing a broken glass, I’m able to see the funny side. I remind myself that little events like this can make life all the more colorful.

Understandably, if your confusional arousal episodes are causing problems because of aggressive behavior, sleep disruption, or complaints from a partner, you might not see the funny side.

If it’s just the occasional event of mistaking your phone for a lamp, or not knowing who you are for a moment, then perhaps a smile or laugh is the best way to stop yourself get stressed by it.

Your thoughts

If you’ve experienced confusional arousals I’d be very interested to hear from you. What exactly happens during your episodes? Have you found anything that makes them more or less frequent?

It’s often the case that readers find reassurance in knowing that they aren’t the only ones who experience a particular sleep disorder. So please feel free to share your story in the comments below.

658 Comments

  1. I have been waking up in the morning thinking my mother is in the house. I even ask my husband, when I go downstairs, “Where’s mum?” She has been dead for 11 years. I am very disoriented and think my father is around too somewhere? Very weird. He has been dead for 20 years. No pharmaceuticals in my life but i do take weed oil to sleep. This is happening quite often. Takes a few minutes to re-orient myself.

    • Omg, I am experiencing the same thing only it is mainly with believing my father is in the house and less often my mother. My father died 11 years ago too and my mother died 16 years ago. It is the strangest feeling and like you, it takes a few minutes to re-orient myself. No pharmaceuticals in my life either. This has only been happening the last year or so.

  2. Hi there, I keep having dreams that I am on my boat in the middle of the ocean sleeping and the anchor has lifted and I drift off into the middle of nowhere, I wake up freaked in my dark bedroom searching for a way of the boat but can’t find my door on my windows and I end up screaming out loud until I realise where I am and wake up. I now have been dreaming lately that my three kids are staying with me in my house when they are staying with their mother, I half wake up walking around the house searching for my three kids and they aren’t there and I panic until I wake up completely and realise that they aren’t with me this week. I have woken up just on day break outside in the front yard nude shadowboxing chasing someone around the front yard, I woke up when the ex came to the front door asking me what the hell I’m doing, and I had absolutely no idea how I got out there awhile was there, all I knew I was doing was that I was fighting someone that wasn’t there. Lucky no one was walking past at the time on an early morning walk. Similar things like things happen on a weekly basis sometimes I remember the more vivid than other times. I have found that it seems to happen after nightshift and I have had a couple of drinks, apart from that I am unsure how why it happens.

  3. I have been having these drunken arousels every night for a few months they vary from goin and eating lots of biscuits with out knowing to walking in to doors standing in the middle of the bed room and coming to with either my top or bottoms off to actually goin on face book and posting a status that’s makes no sence and jusmping up not knowing ware I am it’s really getting me down

  4. Over the past year about 6 times I have been waking about an hour after i fall asleep feeling confused about where I am, who my husband is, but about 4 times I’ve woken up asking where my mum is or looking for her… It’s almost like I am a child again and I am looking for the responsible adult in the house. It only lasts maybe 30 seconds but I have bad anxiety afterwards, my heart pounds and I am scared to go back to sleep with the fear that next time I might not snap out of it!
    I have been to a therapist for anxiety which I have had all my life but I manage this. We have tried hypnosis to find out if my subconscious is remembering something from a child and it did come up with a memory of when my parents went on holiday without me, maybe this comes up in my dreams? Who knows?
    I do feel that maybe i am just in a very deep sleep I get woken maybe by my husband or dog etc and my brain just needs to catch up with my body…
    Because when my child cries out in the night my reaction is 100% there mind and body, almost like adrenaline has kicked in immediately which makes the difference.
    I do find this confusion happens more when I am really tired and stressed.

    • Wow, I have very similar experiences when i wake up. Not knowing who my husband is, thinking he is a stranger and looking for my mother, who has passed. Weird and scary but only lasts for a bit and then i am back to reality.

  5. I have sleep drunkeness often. It happens randomly. Sometimes i remember none of it and sometimes I only remember bits and pieces. It hasn’t really affected me negatively though. If anything it’s funny for me to hear my family explain what i do during my episodes. I think they are started when I wake up abruptly. Like, just last night my mom stepped on a dog toy (so she said. i don’t remember what woke me up) and i sat up and started looking around in my bed and at the walls like i was looking for something. My mom told me to go back to sleep and i just said okay and fell asleep again just like that. I apparently go back to sleep instantly. I also have hallucinations. For some reason at times i’ll be in a deep sleep, i’ll see a shadowy figure of something and panic for a few seconds and then go back to sleep again. One time it was a figure of a spider over my head and i shot out of bed and turned on the lights, turned them off and then was out like a light again. My mom says from what she has seen, most of the time i’m either looking for someone or something during my episodes or i get mean and angry. Another time i fell asleep on the couch while my mom was watching tv and i sat up saying “where’s the girl? They were looking for a girl. Did they find her?” And my mom of course was confused and she was like “what girl? What are you talking about?” And i got angry and stomped up the stairs and as soon as I hit the bed i fell back asleep. I don’t remember any of that. ANOTHER time i woke up to find my PS4 remote in my underwear drawer under some underwear. I was like how did that get there? And then i figured it was most likely one of my episodes. Long story short they’re weird and unpredictable, but make for a funny story.

  6. Hi I am 48 years old and my parent died a long time ago, I am an only child married with children. I the past week I have woken up with the feeling that the children have gone to work, my dad has gone to work in the hotels nearby but I cannot remember where my mum is, is she still working at the Abbey National? is she working? at home somewhere? and then within a minute or two it kicks in that both my parents are dead and it is my husband that is at work at the hotel. Apparently I asked my husband what my youngest was doing at summer camp today, when camp is over and she is staying with her dad for 2 weeks. I am beginning to worry. I also have anemia and lack of balance…….. help!

  7. Hi, my name is monica.This question is not for me, but for my son. My sons girlfriend tells me that my son at night while he’s sleeping, calls out, MOM! Like if when he was a child… And he does it often… There was an incident when he woke up and she kissed him, and he told her, why are you kissing me? You are my mom. He’s been doing this for over a year. And they call each other babe, but I hear him sometimes say mom , than quickly says babe… Why is he doing this?

  8. My partner works nights and gets up around 0000 for the last few weeks when he is working he goes to bed and wakes up after about three hors gets up and gets dressed for work . I then have to persuade him to go back to bed . I have tried many things pointing out to him when he wakes it is light and it should be dark. He also seems to know what time it is but does not seem to understand it’s not time for work. He has recently been diagnosed with Parkinson’s and I was wondering if it could be the drugs he is on. He is convinced he has got Alzheimer’s
    Regards
    Su

  9. yes, this happens to me from time to time. Another thing to point out is that I’m lucid in my knowledge that I have just woken up and don’t know where I am. Once I realize that, I rather enjoy the experience but it lasts two or three seconds before I remember where I am. This typically happens when I take a nap in a strange place like a hotel when traveling. I live in Springfield, Illinois so you can bet a travel a lot. LOL Enjoyed the article.

  10. Hi … usually people don’t wake me up but recently my partner tries to wake me up and usually when I haven’t rested, am anxious (I usually am an anxious person) and more if I had some wine or alcoholic beverage, I react in a very unloving way, even violent, kicking him away or cussing at him :(. I have absolutely no memory and just think I was asleep and he is hurt by my actions the next day. I’m made to feel so guilty and I feel like I wasn’t even present. It’s good to know this is common but I am a bit at a loss on what to do other than sleeping more, apologizing for whatever I did, and asking him to please not wake me up :)?!

  11. My partner has had real sleep problems for the last 4 years or more. She can fall asleep in almost seconds but will wake up for brief periods dozens of times a night. Recently it has got worse as now she will perch herself up in the bed and complain about strange things like “not knowing an email address for work” or “wanting to know how long she has to wait on hold”. At first I found it quite funny but with the frequency of it and her already exhausted during the day because she wakes up so often I have started to worry.

  12. For the last year I have been waking up in middle of night thinking I need to grab some clothes in case someone comes – whether it be house guests or someone at the door – and I am in my pajamas. I know I am doing it. I remember doing it. And by the time I crawl into bed again with the clothes next to me on the floor, I usually realize what I was doing. I can’t find anything about this certain behavior so wondering if anyone has a similar experience?

  13. Thank you for the informative article. I just woke from a short nap on the couch & was completely disoriented as to the correct time or day. I thought I had slept for an entire day & had missed work. It was actually evening & I already worked today. I got up looked at the clock, panicked, went to the bathroom, looked at the clock in the bathroom, the computer, every room in the house & my cell phone. I was panicked that the date showed “yesterday” but the time was “today” in the evening. I was so panicked I started crying. This lasted about 5 min or more Before I realized it was indeed evening & I already worked today. Frightening. Thank you for the insightful info on what I probably experienced.
    (Note: I suffer from insomnia & depression for years)

  14. I honestly woke up at 3am with my phone flashlight on and I was kneeling by it my mom walked in and asked why the light was on I was so confused. It freaked me the f out

  15. I found your article very interesting. I have found myself in the last 6 to 7 months waking after being asleep for only 60 to 90 minutes. This happens approximately 1 to 2 times a week at most. I jump out of bed and I’m either shouting that I forgot my meds or that I forgot to wash my face. After a few minutes I realize my face is clean of all makeup or that I have taken my pill and I go back to sleep. I think it is strange that I must be worrying about my pill or face but my husband seems very concerned that there is something terribly wrong. We have experienced the death of our oldest son about 10 months ago and I know I a continue to grieve for him. I believe I just have depression. The last few days after taking my meds I tell my husband that I have taken my meds to get it in my head that I have taken them and more or less reassure myself that I have taken them. Saying this vocally seems to help; at least so far.

  16. Hello
    Just wondering what your thoughts are I wake within an hour of sleeping in a confused state thinking that I haven’t taken my medication. This has happened to me for years now and each and every time I genuinely believe I need my medication. What is really strange is that I am not on medication and other than taking an odd tablet for a headache I have never taken any drugs prescribed or otherwise. When this happens which can be a few times a week it’s like it is the first time.

    • Hi Ava
      Thanks for your comment. I’m not sure why this would be happening. Perhaps you could try an experiment for a week where before you go to sleep you could take a minute to reassure yourself in bed that you’re absolutely fine, in good health and don’t need to take any medication. If you put the thought into your head that way, it might help stop it from appearing when you wake up.
      Regards
      Ethan

    • Hello
      I have had the same thing for years. It started with waking thinking I’d forgotten something and later became a pill that I thought I should have had. All very important that I take it. I took none at that time. It’s every night now and it’s several seconds of pondering wondering what the pill is and what it’s for and it’s vital I take it. All very disconcerting. I do tell myself that it’s total rubbish but nevertheless the feeling of fear to have missed the pill is very real. I feel better that I’m not alone in this. Sleep well!

  17. My husband often wAkes up and does strange things. Last night he came downstairs in his dressing gown and said. ” come on ,we are going to miss the plane” when I said , we are not going anywhere, he said “well why did you wake me then. This often happens after he has had a couple glasses of red wine. I thought it was to do with aging as he only started doing it about a year ago, but after reading these posts, I am not so worried.

  18. Thank God I’m not alone! I think I have chronic confusional arousal. I don’t remember what I’ve said or done. I talk in my sleep. When someone tries to wake me up, I’ve been told I scream. I’ve even raised my fist as if about to hit them and then I stare off into a daze until I officially wake up. I terrified a nurse when I was in the hospital. She touched me to wake me up, and I jumped up in bed and screamed, “Shoot!” She said I stared for a second and then came back to reality. I experience these episodes at least once or twice a week, though sometimes I can go a couple of weeks and sleep like a baby. It just feels good to know I’m not alone. My husband says I’m crazy!

  19. I have been having what I call a half sleep disorder. I get up in the night looking for something but can not describe it. I will look under the sheets, under the bed , behind the curtains etc. The worst night I was looking for a little boy, I looked all through the house and in a panic I got the flashlight and looked outside and in my car. Finally I went in the house and sat down and went over the evening events and remembered that no one had been at my home that night except my daughter and I. I have episodes several times a month. I thought I had been having them for the last two years since I got done work, but my hubby said I have been having them ever since I got Addisons Disease 21 years ago. Sometimes I think I am going nuts, until I recently was talking to my first cousin and she does the same thing. She also had a panicky night looking for a child! She said she has noticed that it seems to happen if she has a snack before bed. Sorry to be so long winded, but this is my story. I do not have mental illness, but am on medication for Addisons and acid reflux.

  20. So for the past few years I have experienced something similar to this and it even happend this morning. I will hold full conversations with my mother about some chores or something I need to do and then a few hours pass and I wake up she tells me she told me to do something hours ago and I have no recollection of the conversation. It only happens when somebody attempts to wake me. Also, I will wake up and have many family members furious at me about what I had just said to them five minutes ago when they woke me up but I have no memory of saying anything or even waking up, and I hear I can get very aggressive. This is putting a strain on me and my family because nobody will believe me that I don’t remember these things as it seems like an excuse any teenager would use for getting out of chores or cursing at people. Very frustrating to say the least.

  21. Wake up in a panicked state searching for a baby that does not exsist. Feels very real. Takes a few moments to realize it is not real. Occurred a handful of times.

  22. Hi, I’m 20 years old and I work at a doctors office and I usually wake up from my sleep feeling like my patients are starting at me and are in my room. As if I have my bed in my work space and I’m embarrassed to sleep because they’re watching me. I know it may sound normal but it’s pretty creepy and I’ve been working there for almost a year already and I would think I would be used to it?

  23. I would wake up off and on reaching out in the corner of different rooms and I caught myself stuffing my daughters robe in the toilet, I went to get a drin and fell asleep like a starfish in the middle of the kitchen floor… Wierd stuff like that, but on nights when I go to bed very very tired

  24. I’ve been doing strange things since I was a child: thinking the fan was attacking me, walking to my parents room to use the bathroom, waking up and thinking I have forgotten to feed an animal I don’t have, waking up thinking I’ve forgotten something in general or need to take care of something. Last night I recall going to the foot of my bed and reaching down to the floor for whatever reason. I’ve also woken up with my bedroom door locked but no recollection of doing it. There are many stories I’ve heard that I’m not even sure if I believe them all since they are so strange. I woke up certain there was a snake on the headboard one night and have even woken up in the middle of an argument with my partner. Weird stuff!

    A little about myself: I am in my mid thirties, suffer from depression and take anti-depressants. I usually only get 5-6.5 hours of sleep a night and it seems to be worse when I’m more tired or when I’ve got a lot on my mind.

  25. I have been waking up thinking gibberish with a strong sense of urgency. I go over and over the irrational thought, afraid I’ll forget it, until I realize I must have dreamed it. Sometimes, these gibberish thoughts are tasks that don’t make sense. The imperative need to complete the gibberish tasks in a consecutive order keeps me locked in my bed until I become rational. Sometimes the obscure thought is accompanied by an urge to knock the snot out of my partner, start running from here to there turn left here and never stop, or just scream forever. Luckily, I haven’t the physical energy to fulfill these orders. My brain goes over and over what I need to do until I rationalize that I don’t really need to do that. What in the hell is that called??

    I understand that I’m not the only person that wakes up with illogical or irrational thoughts. There must be a word for it. I don’t understand the overwhelming sense of urgency that comes with these thoughts. I’m psychoanalyzing myself, praying for spiritual guidance, considering a bed cuff for my dominant hand…I could just ignore it, go with it, but the idea of possibly fulfilling these missions scares the hell out of me. It’s like pre-sleepwalk warning signs or something.

    • Your comment is the best thus far describing my experiences. I wake up in the middle of the night and feel like I’m supposed to be doing something that makes no sense. It often involves freezing in one position for a certain amount of time or holding my hands out to the sides to complete a task that can’t occur because it isn’t logical. Now this is the part that doesn’t make sense even as I’m saying it. Last night it involved a rose and three hands and catching pieces of metal that were solid. I woke up in a panic because I failed and started telling my husband knowing it made no sense but I still had to do it. Since I failed, the metal fell down below me and it was supposed to be a solid sheet of metal but it had holes all through it. It was also almost like I was on a platform and all this happened below me. I never get out of bed. These objects are imaginary. I don’t ever wake up and see them. I “remember” them from when I was sleeping. I have woken up and move my hands like I am catching something or staying still in a position because I have to to complete a task or stay safe. I’ll continue to do it even after I’ve woken up. ????????

  26. This was the first time something like this happened to me, when I woke up my light was already on and I was already sitting up. I have a remote for my light so I might’ve turned it on myself, but I was looking under every pillow and throwing my blankets aside and then I went to the edge of my bed and looked down onto the floor. When I realized what I was doing I went back to bed, I still don’t know why I did it but is this what you call “sleep drunkenness” ?

  27. Okay, after reading the entire article as well as the stories of others whom shared, we are absolute that this confusion all arousal is exactly what our son suffers from. Why do I say suffers, because he is 11 this July 2017 and is embarrassed to do sleep overs for sure do to his bedwetting.
    For ever we could not understand why. He was far beyond 5 years of age yet he was still wetting the bed. For a child that was fully potty trained by 3 and practically self motivated it just didn’t seem to make sense. One night on vacation it all became very clear. My husband and all of the children were deep in slumber as I searched the web for family fun activities for the next day, when it happened. Our son more than half asleep and seemingly drunk and confused awoke and rose, clearly headed to the restroom. Out of the bed and only 3 steps made he rubbed his face, looked around entirely confused and headed straight back to bed, I can only assume, believing perhaps he had already gone. As I watched, he climbed back into bed and resettled himself, at that moment I uncovered myself and escorted him to the bathroom, quietly and gingerly helping him along.
    OMGOSH it was then all too clear at age 8 exactly why I had been washing his linens generally every day.

    We have always been encouraging, at times using “tough love” yet not coarse or too tough. We have a fluid intake cut off time, and make sure he goes before bed, yet it is rare that he makes it to the bathroom after bedtime. Our children are in bed by 930pm and have healthy diets, and what I would call a predominantly wholesome family life. We do not condone prescription drugs to remedy this nor does he have any mental conditions or hindrances which would make other prescriptions a necessity.
    We have tried changing fluid in take times, waking him during the night (but even we need sleep) changing bed times, “night time” undies. We have “hit the wall” and only wish to help. We do not wish him to be fearful of sleepovers, that is not a carefree childhood!

    • Hi Duch
      Thanks for your comment. I can understand your concern about this. Whether it’s due to confusional arousals or not is hard to say, but if you feel it fits then it might be. It’s something that I think is good to talk to a doctor about though. There are various possible causes of noctural bedwetting, and it’s good to rule out physical causes. A doctor can also suggest forms of treatment, and help you understand the best way to tackle it positively without it impacting on his self-esteem or confidence.
      Regards
      Ethan

  28. Sometimes my spouse wakes me up because they think they see something coming out of or on the wall. Occasionally they can wake me and get me to see it as well. Sometimes it’s spiders, mice, worm like things.
    Recently though, they are waking me up and getting us both to talk about how we are in a strange place. That we were somehow put in the wrong place, but that we are going to have to live it. It feels like something has taken over my body. I can hear and see but I don’t have control over what see or say. I feel like I’m asking “it” to leave but no one can hear me. I usually cannot move, like I am stuck. Eventually in both instances I either wake up all the way, or fall back asleep. My spouse never remembers any of it.

  29. I have been taking amitryptalin for 20 years for migraines…I am now having odd symptons. At times the first thing I see when I open my eyes is something surrounding me. Such things as black butterflies, gargoyles, maggots, etc. I am awake, and I know they are not real, and it lasts about 10 seconds. Any insight?

    • This used to happen to me when I was younger. Look up Hypnagogia. It is a sleep disorder in which you see things that are not there. Like you, I was aware that they were not real. I knew that of I waited a bit they would fade away. Now I am experiencing more like the article, I wake up confused.

  30. Hi there iv been reading your article and I have been worried about my sleeping patterns most nights before I fall asleep I see random people having conversations with me or I walk into strange houses or places and see groups of people having conversations sometimes I join in but not meaning to it’s like my body and brain just responds other times I see visions of people by the bed stood next to me strange men or old women but I feel like I’m awake . I also get up out of bed and try to leave through the wardrobe or even the front door when on holiday my husband has to put suitcases against the door so I don’t leave the hotel room in the middle of the night ,he and my kids have caught me trying to leave the house during the middle of the night with a loo roll in hand, iv got up in the middle of the night and brought random things into the bedroom from the garden the keys to the back door are now hidden every night , my husband struggles to sleep as he gets worried about what I will do in the night i.e. Making piles of cheese toasies and don’t remember anything about it. I have lots of bad dreams when I sleep if I’m not up walking around and when I wake up in the morning I don’t know were I am or who I am and say lots of random phrases on trying to wake up . I don’t have a mental health problem although I do support people with mental health and only drink occasionally. Your thoughts would be appreciated.

    • Hi Emma
      Thanks for your comment. I can understand why you’re so concerned – it must be worrying for you and your family not knowing what will happen in the night. I think in this case, it’s a good idea to talk to your doctor about it, and perhaps ask to see a sleep specialist. Hopefully they can help provide a diagnosis if there’s a sleep disorder there, and recommend the most appropriate treatment.
      Regards
      Ethan

  31. Hi I usually get about 5 to 6 hours of sleep a night. Sometimes less. And quite often my wife has to wake me after I have fallen asleep on the couch. I am not happy usually but i mainly speak random sentences and could be mildly irritated. I wake up the next day remembering nothing. The other night she tried waking me after an event and had to pinch my arm to wake me from the car ride home and I lost it. I went crazy. And I had no clue in the morning what happened. I had been drinking alchahol and was in a steroid prednisone for a sinus infection. My doctor seems to think it was more of the prednisone and being woken up in the middle of my sleep rather than the alcohol. I have never been that angry before and I couldn’t believe it at first. I am scheduled to see a sleep specialist soon but my wife keeps telling me I’m making excuses and I still chose to do it. I dont know what to do to show her that it wasn’t me or if it was me what I can do to not be angry when woken up. My prednisone was not tapered treatment. I was on the 4th day of 40mg a day for 5 days. I quit taking the medicine and have had crazy bouts of depression and sadness ever since that night. I was very confused and shaky and had to leave work. I don’t know how to show my wife that it wasn’t me in there. I feel like a lunatic

  32. I don’t know if this is the same thing, or if it is related to sleeping with my cell phone nearby for its alarm, but I have woken up twice in the past year and have been unable to decipher the time and/or words on the screen of the cell phone. It is as if I never learned to read. I think it only lasts for 30 seconds to a minute. Is this the same thing?

  33. I recently had a dream in which I realized that I had forgotten to remove an earring before going to sleep. In the dream I took off the earring and placed it on a surface that’s on the left side of my bed. Several days later I was amazed to find a single earring on that surface but what startled me most was that it was a very special earring that I’ve never worn and which is kept in a jewelry box across the bedroom. Dreaming about an earring and then finding an earring several days later and not knowing how that earring got next to my bed has really concerned. Could I have been sleepwalking and went and put on the earring?

  34. My partner sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night and rolls on top of me, pinning me on the bed and sucks hard on my neck (or sometimes my cheek) leaving a huge red hickey that could really be embarrassing. When I try to resist, he just pins me harder on the bed. It could last for a few seconds and usually he goes back to sleep after the episode. When I tell him about it in the morning, he says doesn’t remember any of it. We normally just laugh about it but sometimes I think that it could be dangerous, that he could be choking me next and I’m too weak to fight it. I don’t know how to convince him to check with a doctor and not offend him or anything.

    • Hi Hannah
      Thanks for your comment. I think it sounds quite frightening from what you describe, and something that he should get checked out. I don’t think you should avoid talking to him because you might offend him, when your feeling of safety at the vulnerable time of sleep is at stake.
      You could perhaps start by telling him that you’ve done some research online into what it could be. I’d look into REM sleep behavior disorder as another possible avenue to explore. Mention that the advice online all says it’s good to see a doctor and/or sleep specialist and see what he says. And at the end of the day, I think it’s important to be honest and tell him you’re a bit worried and finding it stressful. If he cares about you then even if he feels bad about it, he’ll hopefully speak to someone.
      Regards
      Ethan

  35. I constantly wake up or so I think I’m awake and have no memory of what I am supposed to do on that day? Whereas I will go back to sleep as I think I’ve got nothing to get up for! I wake up I don’t know where I am or who I am or what I’m doing in this house or room, it takes me a good five minutes ? Well I don’t actually know how long to realise that I’ve got to get children up for school and I myself have got an appointment or uni or my job! But I have had this since I can remember. Not every night but I would say a good 4/7 mornings, when I don’t have it, I can be fine Spring out of bed and get ready get kids ready etc. My daughter had tried having a conversation and says that I sounded drunk! I don’t drink or smoke at all. I take no prescription medications either, in fact I really try to be healthy, I would like some help but have no idea where to go ! I thought that this was normal and everyone was like this, but I have noticed because I forget who I am or what I’m doing I get really anxious because of it

  36. Hi Ethan,

    I have for many many years, at least since adolescence (I’m 33) had these episodes. Let’s see if I can explain.. I wake up and am convinced that I have somehow fundamentally altered my reality, when having these kind of episodes I believe completely that something I have done has meant massive consequence. For the life of me I cannot give you an example of what I have supposedly changed, but by the time morning comes, everything is fine and the world still turns. What happens after the first one of these episodes, is I continue to wake up regularly throughout the night, full of anxiety of the change I somehow made, resulting in a terrible nights sleep.

    What strikes me, is I cannot remember any specifics of what has caused me this stress and anxiety, but I can vividly remember how I felt because of it.

    I don’t have clinical depression, and my anxiety is usually just relating to day to day stuff (unless a small space is involved, that’s another story), I’m not on any drugs.

    I think it happens a lot when I have a lot on, and am feeling deadlines creeping up on me. Perhaps it’s my brain attempting to process these stresses and just making it worse!

    Anyway, thought I’d share my experience, thanks for your article, I like having a name for my experiences now!

    Thanks

    Sarah

    • Hi Sarah
      Thanks for your comment, and I’m happy to hear you liked the article. Have you thought about learning/trying relaxation techniques in bed when you wake up feeling anxious about the experience you had? It might not stop it in the first place, but it can help you calm down and sleep better hopefully afterwards.
      Regards
      Ethan

      • Hi Ethan,

        The above comment was me, a little over a year ago. Thanks for you suggestion of relaxation techniques, I certainly have tried a lot of mindfulness apps etc, but I’m not all that consistent with it (which probably doesn’t help)

        What has changed over the past year however has been my memory of my confused arousals. I feel like that has something to do with knowing it’s not just me and having a name for the issues now where as previously I just though I was going crazy! Your article has helped with this of course!

        Now that I can remember some of these occurrences, I thought I would share them.

        1. I woke up in the middle of the night and turned on my lamp. When looking at my bedside table, it suddenly occurred to me that something important was missing. I then proceeded to empty all 3 drawers of the bedside table onto the floor, looking for this important item. When I finished this, I came to properly, looked at my bedside table again, and confirmed everything that should have been there was still there! No idea to this day what the important item was!

        2. I once moved a coat hanger that was on my door handle to the back of a chair because my brain told me it absolutely HAD to happen.

        3. Just last night I was searching my room for a red shirt that doesn’t exist.

        All very strange, and while interrupted sleep is not fun, I can’t help but laugh at myself.

        The other stories on here are quite a read too!

        Wishing everyone here full nights sleep!

        Thanks

        Sarah

        • Hi Sarah
          Nice to hear from you again! Thanks for sharing your latest experiences. I’m glad the article was helpful, and I think you’ve touched on an important point about not worrying so much about it. Often, it’s the not knowing that causes us even more stress. So once we know what’s happening, and that we’re not the only ones, it goes a long way to coping better.
          Regards
          Ethan

  37. Wow. I’m not sure I can self-diagnose, but I might have something like sleep drunkenness. It’s very difficult for me to wake up in the mornings, and a lot of the time it has to do with laziness, but often I wake up not understanding what’s going on and I mix up dreams and reality. When my mom wakes me up I’ll start talking about chickens or something. Then I’m late for school because I won’t remember I have to wake up to go there, as opposed to busting secret agent elephants or something

  38. I woke up multiple times last night suddenly and just felt out if place. But it got bad when I dreamt about smoke and again I was suddenly woken up choking on air. It actually felt as if I was choking. First time it’s gotten like this. Had me worried.

    • Hi there
      If you regularly wake up gasping for air, that’s something that needs to be checked out by your doctor to make sure you don’t have any sleep related breathing disorders such as apnea.
      Regards
      Ethan

  39. I often hear a switch and the lights go out although there is no light on and my eyes are closed. I think it’s a power cut but really I’m just waking up (no switch and no lights going off)

    • I do that !!! I know how you feel ! I try to make reason out of it as well. I forgot to mention I get a lot of sleep paralysis which frightens me really badly, as I do spiritual clearings for people whom have not nice attachments so that is like a horror film to me !

  40. I am really scared when going to sleep but more so when waking because I get random words, images, sounds, all split second and unrelated that trick my brain and startle me awake again. Sometimes the words are even made up words, I too suffer with anxiety and had a breakdown at Christmas when I didn’t sleep for days and that’s when this started. I’m so scared I’ve damaged some part of my brain. Even when I’m awake now I’m examining my thoughts in case it happens, please help

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